1. |
Navigation
04:31
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Long as I spent, constructing some sort of defense,
Oh heavenly coincidence
To see you unexpectedly
To have to feel it
Inhale your scent, as though I've been
Treading inches beneath the water's surface
That first intake, a gasp for air
And I don't care if you see it on my face.
There is no comfort in the instinct
That makes me ache for you.
And the best I can do is recognize the flaws in my design
That keep you out of reach
And me a step behind,
Just dealing with this feeling.
Can I make you more than an uncertainty
No longer lover, and not my friend
Though I envision a happy end, it's one requires some heavy edits.
I'm losing the stars even as I navigate.
As fate would have it, the only constant is
It's too late for us.
I'm waiting for horizons to separate.
There is no comfort in the instinct
That makes me ache for you.
And the best I can do is recognize the flaws in my design
That keep you out of reach
And me a step behind,
Just dealing with this feeling.
(I) Still linger on your silences,
Intentions left unspoken.
As selfish in desire as
I was in letting go.
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2. |
Movements Into Language
04:57
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I used to know
Every hall and passage
Behind these doors.
Spent hours building
Castle-cloud formations
I'd float away upon
And now I'm standing in your bedroom,
Trying to translate the movements into language I can speak
I am one amongst my thoughts,
And I get lost.
Teach me how to be.
Been on this road
For as long as I can remember
I must have misplaced
Some vital information
Cast off at the wayside
But as long as I'm awake-
I'm not ready to come home yet.
I'd soon forget all of the surfaces my fingers ran across.
I am one amongst my thoughts, and I get lost.
And now I'm standing in your bedroom,
Trying to translate the movements into language I can speak
I am one amongst my thoughts,
And I get lost.
Teach me how to be.
On and again,
Faith in the folds,
Running back and forth until you let me in.
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3. |
Best Behaviour
04:59
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Focus on the moment
Fake it while I take it in.
In the grip of foreign forces
The shifting of plates,
cause an earthquake 'neath your skin.
A wave of doubt arises once again.
Falsely found, but hypnotising nonetheless.
I'll know just when to place the call,
There must be someone who owes a favour.
And I don't plan on being a saviour.
Awake and shrug off last night's downfalls.
The pills and bleached emotion.
I walk away for nothing but direction
In a coffee-clouded haze,
I'm always missing my connection.
A wave of doubt arises once again.
Falsely found, but hypnotising nonetheless.
No I've not been on my best behaviour.
There must be someone who owes a favour,
I don't plan on being your saviour.
A wave of doubt arises once again.
Falsely found, but hypnotising nonetheless.
I'll know just when to place the call,
There must be someone who owes a favour.
And I don't plan on being your saviour.
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4. |
What Part of Love
04:03
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It's too cold to walk
But why should you run?
When the gravel turns to asphalt
Your only regret is the setting sun.
Strung between the lampposts
Like a Christmas decoration,
A many months too early, in anticipation.
What part of love do you not understand?
You can tell me I'm wrong, that I've wandered off, and tell me when you
Are ready to start again.
My breath into your lungs,
The very earth in rise and fall
Forever my sweet unrest
Will cover all in a sheet of snow
A year ahead or list out,
A diary line describing how
There was once a spark,
Is it gone?
What part of love do you not understand?
You can tell me I'm wrong, that I've wandered off, and tell me when you
Are ready to start again.
Time is a ripple running across your lake,
It's something I have no sense to estimate.
I'm caught in your wake, inside of the space
Between separation and embrace.
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5. |
The Last Fight
03:39
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You had me reading between your lines,
I had you walking on your tiptoes 'fraid to wake
The beast asleep in me.
You say you're sorry for the millionth time,
When I did everything to bring us to this place,
To make you feel unsafe.
Stars aligned, the sun still rises over us
But that last fight is like a bridge I cannot cross.
Choose to trust the pretty lies still drifting through your ruptured mind.
I'm not gon' fight you on this anymore
My smile be whiter now that I'm rid of your
Secondhand cigarette smoke
But your name still stings my lips on its way out
And I miss you almost every day,
I shouldn't say this. But I miss you every day.
Stars aligned, the sun still rises over us
But that last fight is like a bridge I cannot cross.
Choose to trust the pretty lies still drifting through your open mind.
Hold on to anger with no one to blame.
And I treat my body like a slowly spreading stain.
It's a train of thought off track.
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6. |
Should Have Stayed
03:27
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I did not think this through
Broke all of my promises to you.
It's been at least two years, and some things are slow to change.
But I still know who you are.
See through your clothes right to your scars.
A crime I must commit, when you look at me like that.
The realization is rising slowly
The day I left is sweat upon my brow.
I know I should have stayed.
I see it clearly now.
I should have stayed away,
I will not say a single word out of place.
Is it longing or regret?
Was I missing you if I chose to forget the ways in which your smile pays dues it never owed?
In a moment stretched too thin
The sun sets golden upon your skin.
The tides are high, I'm losing my conviction.
The realization is rising slowly
The day I left is sweat upon my brow.
I know I should have stayed.
I see it clearly now.
I should have stayed away,
I will not say a single word out of place.
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7. |
Foundations
04:44
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Goodness, gracious, G-D almighty
I thought you were gone for good
And now there you stand.
Your nervous hand fumbling with a cigarette.
I steel myself against the feeling,
Appeal to my common sense, but it's just no use. The tricks are quickly spilling out my sleeve.
I'm terrified
I know where I end up, but I don't stop.
You've got a hold on me. Your beauty makes me weak at the knees.
To love you is so easy now, foundations of it are still in place. And you don't have to do a thing.
I did not know if I'd survive,
I dreamt your face for two months straight.
I kissed the corners of my pillowcase,
My heart broke as I came awake.
And I get so dumb when I'm with you
You're the cat that's got my tongue.
When all I ever mean to say,
Is will you stay the night, just stay, 'cause I -
I'm terrified
I know where I end up, but I don't stop.
You've got a hold on me. Your beauty makes me weak at the knees.
To love you is so easy now, foundations of it are still in place. And you don't have to do a thing.
I think your name, that's all it takes. That's all.
That's all it takes for me to break apart.
That's all it takes.
I'm terrified
I know where I end up, but I don't stop.
You've got a hold on me. Your beauty makes me weak at the knees.
To love you is so easy now, foundations of it are still in place. And you don't have to do a thing.
I think your name, that's all it takes. That's all.
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8. |
Undoing Of
04:23
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I know it's been a while.
Don't mean no harm, I just
came to talk.
Forgive me, and give me a moment please.
You know your beauty is confusing
And my memory betrays me, it betrays me.
Bloom and burst before our eyes (before our eyes)
Unraveling sweater-sleeve
The undoing of
A year or two of idling by
The crossing of
Of our divide.
We drove out to the woods
To hear our thoughts out loud
To see the stars.
If time were not so unstable I
I'd be able to
Learn to love you.
Bloom and burst before our eyes (before our eyes)
Unraveling sweater-sleeve
The undoing of
A year or two of idling by
The crossing of
Of our divide.
Walk away,
Pick up the pace,
Until you are far enough
To repeat the mistake.
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Neil Friedlander Tel Aviv Yafo, Israel
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